When we got engaged, K's mother was full of sage advice for us. "Only fight about the things that matter," she admonished. When we started fighting a few months ago, one of our friends had some more prosaic advice. "Don't break up until after New Year's," he instructed me. "There's too much going on right now for you to make big decisions with a clear head." They were both right.
It was our first really big fight, long-distance over the course of the last two months-- related to stress of his last semester and my new job and both of us feeling like the other had excluded us from their lives (and we weren't wrong, but it wasn't related to a lack of caring about each other as much as it was related to a lack of communication and generally being overwhelmed by the major life changes).
The resolution, in short form, was simple: I graduated in May, he graduated a few weeks ago in December, we've both secured jobs (that are even less than an hour apart from one another!), and we're buying a house. We've been busy, building our life together and troubleshooting the issues.
We can do this, and when we fight, we will take the opportunity to grow.
